Black Boys Don't Scare Me

I saw two black teens outside my patio door. Actually, my eight year old daughter Chloe saw them first. We were having a conversation and she stopped talking and started looking past me. I turned to look out while asking, "what do you see?" One of the boys was close enough that I believe he had a foot on the concrete patio. I turned around and when he noticed me he backed up. I think I startled him, as he didn't move immediately. But he started grinning as he backed away. They walked over to my neighbor's patio and did the same and then ran away laughing. This was in broad daylight. Not for one moment was I afraid. I think Chloe was startled, but not afraid. A smirk quickly appeared on her face as she realized what was happening.

They didn't have weapons, they didn't try to get at the door, they didn't yell or scream, nor did they move in complete silence. I had never seen them before, but I recognized their faces. They were the same faces that were mischievous, immature, and fun loving when I was in middle and high school. The same faces I saw knock on doors and run, just for fun. (The same faces I joined in doing so once. I never knocked, I remained closer to the street, too afraid I wasn't fast enough to get away. And while we were afraid that we'd get caught, we were NEVER afraid that we'd get shot.)

No, they weren't casing the neighborhood. There were still a couple days left before the start of the school year and they were out fooling around and being kids. I didn't think about finding a weapon or hiding or even calling the cops. I did throw on some shoes and go outside, but they were long gone.

I wanted to give them a warning-not to leave my family alone, but to be careful. I wanted to tell them that black boys aren't allowed to play pranks, be childish, or even be NEAR other people's property. I wanted to tell them that in America, a person's perception of fear has more value than a black boy's life. That in America, a person's right to protect their property is more important than a black boy's right to live.

Ben Sargent-Still Two Americas

"Don't Seem Scary..."

I can only hope that some other neighbor warns them before someone shoots at them. I can only hope that their parents didn't neglect to have a conversation with them that every black parent in America has to have with his or her sons. I can only hope that after making eye contact with Chloe they had enough adventure for the day and went home. Without walking in the street. Without reaching for a cell phone. Without looking at anybody for too long. Without lingering in any place for too long. And certainly without committing any petty crime. Without being human-which in America, combined with their brown skin, is what causes them to be deemed inherently threatening, and makes them at risk of being killed at any time and then blamed for their own murders.

I'm keeping an eye out for them. Hoping they'll come back around. Somebody needs to warn them about this country they live in.

I'm not afraid OF them. I'm afraid FOR them.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY [AND HAPPY BLOGGING] TO ME!!!

I'M HEEERRRREEE!!!!!

So this blog has been a LONG time coming. I mean a LOOONNGG time coming. I’ve been thinking about this for years—and people have been suggesting it for years—and it’s really been on my mind for the last few months. 

Recently, the biggest thing that was holding me back was finding a good name and a focus. I know, the naming part seems like a lame reason, but I'm a big picture kind of girl. [That can be a hindrance—sometimes you just need to take the first step!] My mind got wrapped around things like theme and audience. I hadn't written one post or even decided if I wanted to commit to this seriously, and I was already thinking about branding. lol Then there's all the formatting stuff! Not my forte!

But finally, one night, I sat down and I Googled blog names. I read a little advice, I Googled different types of blogs, I searched names I was thinking of, I wrote down words and combinations of words that described my interests and personality, I tried so hard to think of something clever and pretty and cool and witty. 

And I couldn’t.

So I kept going. I made use of a thesaurus and a literary technique—alliteration—and this is what I came up: Musings, Matters, Melodies. I don't know if it's clever or pretty or cool or witty. But I think it describes me perfectly. 

But EVEN THEN...I didn’t start the blog! Lol This post has been written in three or four different sittings over many months! When I told people I was thinking about it or I was trying...I really was! Well...sort of! ☺

My biggest fear was having a name that was too specific or too general. I’m still a little worried about the latter, but the more I read it the more I like it, and the more I think it really sums up what I’ll be doing here. [But no guarantees that it won’t change.]

Anyway, since I've been pouring out my thoughts to my Facebook friends for years, they've been pushing this. Recently my friend started a hashtag — #whereisthebook. All my friends started responding to everything I wrote with that hash tag. (Ol' bandwagon jumpers.) And yesterday, another friend, sent me this...

Well...I don't know about the book. But here I am, offering my first post! And it’s my birthday! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!! 

With all the symbolism that birthdays bring, why not celebrate the beginning of this writing journey as well?! This is sort of a gift—to myself, and hopefully to the world. I hope that this space will foster great dialogue and education, like the atmosphere on my Facebook page. So I want to say, EVERYBODY is welcome here…BUT…

You can’t bring just anything. Leave your hate, bigotry, ignorance, foolishness, intolerance, arrogance, and general stupidity in some other space. I’m not here for that. BRING your LOVE, perspective, insight, questions, comments, and humor!

This post is long enough, and most of the people that will read it in the near future probably already know me—so I’ll introduce myself in depth in another post! I hope you guys will stay with me on this journey. I hope you will share my thoughts, and share your thoughts. I won’t always make it heavy, but I won’t shy away from serious issues either! We can change the world.